10 years

At 2am, I called you to join me and Bronnie-chan at the bar.

You were still fixing your diamond-making machine, and weary.

You came.

Drinks were drunk. There may have been flirting.

At 4am, the streets still dark at this time of year, we set off for our apartments, arriving at the corner where we would go our separate ways.

You don't have to go home.

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This wasn't flirting. It wasn't the lemon sours or orgasms, either.

This was the first time I was really ready to try being with someone, properly 100% heart and body, hopefully forever.

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The White Horse went up on one wheel, spun around, turned away from your apartment, turned towards mine.

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And now, here we are, 10 years later.

Happy anniversary, sweetheart. I love you!

Fantastic Mr Téo

Every morning this week, Téo braved snowy weather, or else fog so dense you could barely see 10 metres, and temperatures that were never higher than -7 degrees, and which one morning were as low as -13, with a north wind to boot -- conditions that I would definitely choose not to ski in -- to go to ski school. With a cold. Without (much) complaint.

He started the week unable to do a snow plough.

Today, he confidently put on his skis, placed his hands on his knees, and set off down the slope by himself. Then caught the rope tow back up.

Little man, I am so proud of you.

And what is even better than you learning to ski, was your excitement and pride every day when you described something new you could now do.

I can't wait to join you on the slopes.

I guess it's going to take longer than I hoped

So I'd been hoping that Lukan's insistence on do like Téo, do like mummy, do like papa, me as well for everything - which leads to feats like blindly launching himself down a steep ski slope on his tummy, to follow his brother - would accelerate the toilet training.

But then yesterday happened.

He came into the bathroom while I was on the toilet, and saw I had a certain feminine product* in my underpants.

Nappy like Lukan! he said delightedly. Mummy do like Lukan!!

D'oh.

* euphemized for any sensitive male readers

In which emotional literalism meets impatient sarcasm

So Téo was a bit tired this morning after school, and by "a bit tired" I mean melting down faster than the Greenland icesheet and releasing just about as much water.

At first the melt down trigger was being stuck on a particular reading exercise in Reading Eggs, which he has to complete before he can go further. He loves all the exercises except this one, and each time it turns up we go through a few days of misery and avowals of never reading again and how this exercise is stupid and they should just take it out and I won't do it, I won't.

The problem? He has only a certain amount of time to read 15 words, and the fact of being timed sends him into a hyperventillating panic, so he doesn't read the 15 words before the time is up, and then it's I can't do it, I'll never be able to do it, I'm going to end up unloved and all alone.

So anyway, this morning there was much wailing and several failed attempts at having a nap.

And then it was time to go get Lukan.

- I want to stay heeeeere. I don't want to gooooo. I'm too tiiiiiired. I'm not comiiiing.

And so on, for many minutes, with me getting just a little impatient.

- I'm hungreeeee. I need something to eeeeat.

Now, he had eaten breakfast, he had eaten a snack at school, and he had eaten a snack upon getting home from school. Plus, the Lukan pick-up takes 15 minutes. 20 minutes max.

- No, we'll have lunch when we get back.

- But I can't waaaiiit.

- Well, I'll guess we'll just have to risk you starving.

Whereupon his eyes grew huge and somehow even more liquid, he looked at me in horror, and then, in an Academy Award®-winning performance for melodrama, he sunk to the floor in complete and abject misery, howling...

- YOU WANT ME TO DIEEEEEEEE!

Same thing, different experience

This morning in the vineyards...

- It's too cool, the jump. It hurts our bottoms when we land, but it's really fun!

- Waaaahhhhhhh!!! I don't like it, de jump. I don't like de snow. Go home right now!

How not to get a babysitting job in 4 easy steps

1. Start the interview by saying My brother's kids hit me once, so I hit them back.

2. Tap a 2-year-old on the butt and then say What are you still doing in nappies?

3. Tell the same 2-year-old he's not a baby and so shouldn't be sucking his thumb.

4. Tell the parents how much you love kids, while simultaneously ignoring the 2-year-old who has, for the first time since you've arrived, come to you to show you a toy.

Whispers but no songs

The other day, Téo was given a cowrie shell and instructed to put it to his ear.

I can hear the sea mummy!

...

But why can't I hear any mermaids?